I'm Not A Barbie Doll!
by IamJustaCloud
Summary: Deidara finds himself lost and trapped in our world with a heart broken teen and her crazy best friends. He can't find any other member of the Akatsuki and he can't seem to escape their clutches. And worst of all? He's only ten inches tall... DeidaraXOc HidanXOc
1. Prologue:

Prologue:

"Okay guys, I have to show you something."

I close my eyes for a few moments and then open my hands, setting Deidara out onto the small round picnic table. Everyone's eyes widen. Darnell leans forward a bit, almond eyes peering closer, and Alice simply stares at me.

Sarah smiles crookedly. "He's cute!"

She goes to poke him. Deidara lashes out at her, kunai knife catching the tip of her finger, and Sarah jerks back with a yelp. I grab Deidara lightly, shielding him when Sarah goes to kill him. "That little mother fucker! I'll fuck you up, asshole!"

"I'm so sorry, Sarah. I should've warned you. He's a bit touchy." I frown and squeeze my hands slightly, shooting the tiny blonde a swift glare. He grimaces and tries to shift around inside my grasp-to loosen my hold.

"That's an understatement." Darnell laughs lightly and holds his hand out. "Can I hold him?"

I chuckle and nod, holding my hands out to him. Deidara squirms in my grip even more so now, obviously not liking the idea of being passed around like a rare Pokémon card. Darnell takes Deidara from my hands and allows him to stand upright in the palm of his hand.

"Just don't let him escape."


	2. Chapter One:

Alice's dark charcoal eyes narrow-zeroed in on the small crevice between my nose and lower cheek. Carefully, she blots at it with foundation. I close my eyes. Her determination terrifies me. Sarah's skillful fingers run through my long, wet chestnut hair. "How should I style it, Alice?" It's always a good idea to question the beast before making any sudden changes.

"Don't touch it." Alice growls back, the sound thick and buttery in the base of her throat.

I can almost hear Sarah roll her eyes.

Alice is very particular about these things and is the perfect example of how crazy teenage girls have become while dealing with the wonders of beauty. When she was younger, her fashion designer of a mother committed suicide because of a large decrease in profits, thus sparking the 'must be up to date in style' attitude in her daughter.

In cases like tonight, that attitude can be a very good thing. Alice would never let Sarah or I walk out of the house looking anything less than perfect. And when you're going to the party of the century, you kind of need to look perfect to get in.

"Alright, alright." Sarah sighs softly and I pop one eye open in time to see her lean back against the white marble bathroom counter. "But I get to sit in the fancy style chair next."

Alice doesn't answer, too focused in on my closed eye.

Sarah makes a funny face at Alice behind her back. I giggle lightly and Alice lets out another low, animalistic like growl. "Don't move." She barks.

I sigh and close my eye again.

My mind drifts. The idea of seeing my yearlong boyfriend, Brandon, tonight brings a girlish grin to my face. He'd been so sweet about me going with the girls to the party instead of him, agreeing upon us meeting up there. I'm not sure why my dad hates him so much. Brandon is adorable, with his big blue eyes and his shaggy surfer blonde hair.

Although, he can be a bit full of himself sometimes.

Nah, that can't be it. My dad would never hate someone with this much animosity for just a simple thing like that. But I can't think of any other reason. Brandon is sweet, charming, and really goofy. Utterly perfect for a smiley goof like myself.

"Stop moving." Alice hisses.

I'm scared into a frozen like state. Gosh, her intensity is worse than anything else. It's creepy. Sarah laughs lightly and I hear her shuffle around. A drawer opens and then slides shut with a soft thud. Alice growls at her and Sarah sets whatever she'd picked out of the drawer down onto the counter.

"I just want her to see every angle." Sarah defends in a rather irritated tone.

Naturally, Sarah would get irritated with Alice so quickly. Sarah is the hothead in our little group. Not only is she quick to get violent, but she also has such a vast vocabulary to use at her disposal. Each word she hisses at you is like a knife being flung at you from a small distance away, while you spin around in small rotations-chained to a wheel. She's one I usually try to avoid when she's angry.

Alice says nothing, which probably only annoys Sarah further. After a couple more minutes, Alice is finished with my face and moves to work with my hair. I can feel her fingers working with each stand, tugging gently and knotting. Briefly, I worry she's tying my hair into knots but then remember that Alice would die if anybody ever did something so atrocious to my hair. Once I relax again, I really relax into the chair. It's like getting a massage after a hard, strenuous day at work.

"Don't fall asleep now, Mia." I hear her say softly.

I sigh. It would be so easy to fall asleep now.

"You look breathtaking." Sarah sucks in a sharp breath. "Brandon's going to die."

"I hope not." I smile and try not to laugh at the image of Brandon clutching his heart dramatically and doubling over. It's a horrible thing for a girlfriend to imagine. I really am horrible.

Alice ties my hair back and then steps back. "Don't open your eyes yet." She orders and I feel the salon chair I'm sitting on spin around. Yes, that's right, I said salon chair. It's only natural that my beauty obsessed best friend would have one in her bathroom-especially when she's filthy rich.

"Alright." Alice breathes. "Now."

My eyes flutter open.

The girl in the mirror looks nothing like me at all, which, in its own way, can probably be considered a good thing. Her long hair is curled up into a bun, two thick braids leading from hairline to the bun, and her side swept bangs cover half her forehead and curl around her right ear. Loose strands frame the rest of her face, making her look almost casual, but it's more of an 'omg-top-hairstyle-of-the-year' type. Smoky-eye makeup is layered perfectly around her large round eyes, making her usually dull gray eyes pop and look more blue. Soft pale pink lips add to the dramatics of her eye makeup, just two shades darker than her ivory skin.

"Holy shit." I breathe.

Her lips move with mine. That's…me, I think, speechless even in my mind.

Alice giggles, looking incredibly smug in the mirror. "Do you like it?"

I nod and my lips stretch into a big cheesy grin.

I climb out of the chair and Sarah happily takes my place. Once again, Alice goes off to work. I watch with limited attention, my mind…elsewhere.

Alice looks gorgeous, already having done her hair and makeup before we'd arrived. Her long black hair is styled back into a thick, girly braid and hangs down the length of her back. Loose strands of her bangs curl around her chin. Her dark hair and dark eyes match with her pretty olive toned skin, skin of which needs absolutely no makeup-lucky butt. Tonight, her eyes are framed with a bright, fiery red color and soft bronze tones to even it out. It looks as if her eyes are surrounded by flames.

Her outfit for tonight is a shimmery red tunic with long bellowing sleeves-the tops sliced open to reveal the smooth skin of her arms, complete with lacy black dragon etched into the side of the material. The dragon's large, sharply toothed mouth is wide open with a snarl directed at her navel. She wears black leggings and black flats-with a matching red bow sewn into the buckles-and black fishnet fingerless gloves. I'm wearing a soft white halter top-with spaghetti straps. Its bodice is constructed entirely out of ruffles, flowing down in a soft, elegant way. It's cute, doesn't accentuate the curves I don't have, and is a very sweet shirt all in all. I like it because it makes me look tanner than I really am. Though the hemline almost swallows the short dark denim skirt Alice forced me into. Sarah is going with a more natural look tonight, with earthy toned makeup and a shimmery green traditional Chinese blouse, with short sleeves and a high collar, and a soft tan mini.

I lean against the counter and fold my arms across my chest. Sarah laughs lightly at me; I must be making a strange face, and closes her eyes as Alice shifts her attention accordingly. Soon enough, Alice is finished with her face and moves to Sarah's long blonde curls. She pulls them back, pinning her long bangs back with a small blonde colored rubber band behind her head-giving her that half up-half down do.

"Done!" Alice chirps and steps back, clasping her hands together.

Sarah looks in the mirror, a bewildered look on her face. She must be having a moment like I did, where you can't recognize your reflection.

Slowly, she stands. We all move into Alice's deep red room. I step into my small white flip-flops and Sarah steps into her suede green flats. That's one thing I had to fight for. Even if I have to dress up, I refuse to wear anything other than flip-flops.

Alice leads us down the main white marble staircase. Sarah moves ahead of her and opens the front door, leaving it open for us to close behind ourselves, and quickly makes her way to her large burgundy jeep. At the pace she's moving, I'm surprised my clumsy friend doesn't trip.

She climbs into the driver's seat and the jeep roars to life. Alice pauses to lock the door behind her and I climb into the backseat, cursing softly.

"I swear, Sarah, I'm going to buy a fucking stepstool for your car." I snap irritably as I buckle up. I'm way too short for this stuff.

Sarah giggles and says nothing. Alice neatly leaps up onto the little step outside the door and climbs into the passenger seat, silently shutting her door and buckling up.

And then we're leaving.

My stomach twists with anxiety. It's that uneasy feeling you get just before something huge, something utterly life changing is about to happen.

Lightly, I touch my stomach and my gaze flickers out the window. I watch the scenery pass by at blurring speeds and then slowly start to slow as we near Christine's house. Christine is an old friend of mine and, despite her sudden bitchy attitude, one of the most popular girls at our High School. I only allow her to continue talking to me because I find her popularity useful.

Christine's house is large, two stories with five bedrooms and five baths. Right now, it's pulsing with life and vibrating with the loud bass of the music that's pounding through the air. It's so loud, a headache begins to brew deep within my head and I sigh softly. This will be a quick night.

Maybe I can convince Brandon to leave early with me. Despite his partier attitude, I know he'd care enough if I told him I wasn't feeling well and take me home. I could deal with my Dad's hissy fit later.

Sarah pulls into the crowded driveway and turns the engine off. We all hop out and shut the doors behind us. Alice moves to my side immediately and loops her arm through mine. She has a weird sixth sense, on top of her fashionista demeanor, and can always tell when I'm not feeling right. That, and she's extremely protective of me.

Darnell waits for us at the door, which hangs wide open behind him. We all break out into wide smiles and he rushes forward to greet us.

"You look amazing, guys!" He gushes.

Well, he looks amazing himself. The lower lid of his almond eyes is laced with a sparkly gold eyeliner and the tips of his spiky black hair match. Normally, my flamboyant friend isn't much for makeup but tonight he's totally pulled it off. His purple and black plaid shirt hangs open, revealing the dark black tank-top he wears underneath. The sleeves are pushed up to his elbows, revealing a lot of his smooth tan skin, and his black slacks look nice.

Alice snorts. "Have you looked in the mirror recently? I mean, god! We can't even stand by you, you're so sexy."

Darnell closes one eye in a sly wink. "Thanks, love."

I giggle and shake my head. Sarah, who is strongly against homosexuals, has made an exception for Darnell and she throws her arms around his neck, squeezing tightly. When she lets go, she shakes her head and scowls. "Damn, boy! I'll be surprised if you go home alone tonight. You're bound to turn every one of those fuckers inside gay."

"Alright, it's getting hot out here." I smile and start for the promising looking door. Even from a few feet away, I can feel the cool wisps of air-conditioned air caressing my face.

Alice hurriedly ushers everyone in. I knew mentioning the heat would spike her perfectionist mode. She's not one to let her hard work die out, or in this case, melt off.

Darnell closes the door behind us. The place is packed, almost over flowing with people dancing and drinking and laughing and screaming. Though, the latter two are almost impossible to hear over the loud music.

"Look at all these hoes grinding their booties!" Sarah barks as my fingers curl around her wrist.

"Come on, let's get something to drink." I shout over the music.

Alice grabs Darnell and tugs him to the dance floor eagerly. With Sarah's clumsiness and my lack of grace, we'd decided long ago that our dance skills should only be shown in private, more secluded areas where people are less likely to get hurt. Sarah shakes her head and her blue eyes narrow at two girls, whose tongues are dancing in midair.

I stop at the refreshment table and pick up a pink cup and a can of soda.

Sarah takes the pink cup and inhales whatever is inside. I smile lightly, she's going to be so drunk by the end of the night, and take a sip of my Mtn Dew.

"Damn hoes." Sarah grumbles, picking up another cup. "I can't stand it!"

I giggle.

"What the hell are you laughing at?!" Sarah barks my way. She's an angry drunk, and is absolutely hilarious to watch. I shake my head and listen to her grumble something about silly giggle-boxes and their stupid, annoying laughter.

My gaze moves to something behind her, two figures almost hidden within the crowd, sitting alone on the couch. That feeling spikes up again, sharper than before, and I feel sick to my stomach. I could've sworn…

"What the fuck are you looking at, bitch?!" Sarah scowls and snaps her fingers in front of my face, wrenching my attention back to her. "I'm trying to have a god damn conversation with your ass and yet you can't even nod your damn head properly. I swear, I'm going to just do it for you next time."

My eyes widen. "S-Sorry."

"Are you okay?" Sarah's face scrunches up with a mixture of diluted concern and confusion. "What the hell is wrong with you? You got all pale all of a sudden…"

I simply shake my head.

Ignoring her frustrated shouts, I slink forward and squeeze between the crowd of people blocking my view. The feeling in my gut morphs into something larger, more dangerous and I can hardly breathe. I could've sworn I'd seen messy blonde hair…but I must be wrong. Brandon hasn't texted me yet and he said he would as soon as he got here.

He'd never lie…right?

I freeze a good three feet away, my blood running icy cold, my stomach dropping through my feet. His hand, hidden beneath her short pink shirt, squeezes her breast. Their lips are locked, tongues wrestling around, and her fingers are tangled into his shaggy blonde hair. Hips grinding, sensual moans escaping their lips, everything else drowns out around me like it is being washed away with a hose.

And all I can think is, really?

They part, lust glazed eyes locking, and Christine nods slightly.

It's when they stand that they notice my existence.

Brandon's baby blues widen into saucer-like plates. Despite the sudden ambush of heartache that racks through my entire being, I fashion a cold, unimpressed look onto my face and meet his gaze evenly.

"Wow." I say, voice even and icy cold.

He flinches. "W-Wait, Mia, I can expl-"

"I don't want to hear it." I cut him off and my lips stretch into a sweet, dangerous smile. Turning, I start to walk towards the dance floor, to find Alice, but his fingers around my elbow makes me stiffen into a solid block of ice.

"Mia," He whines softly, in his buttery thick voice.

I thaw.

My fist swings back and I wrench around, knuckles slamming into his stomach. Christine screams loudly, shrill voice surpassing the music, and hastily lets go of his arm as he hunches over. I don't give him time to recover. My knee jerks up, knocking his face back up, and I grab two fistfuls of his hair. I slam him down into the coffee table, splintering the dark wood.

The music cuts off. Bodies freeze in awkward positions and I step back, wiping my hands. Brandon groans softly, rolling brokenly away from the mangled ruins of the table. Alice pushes her way through the crowd and grabs me by the wrist, painfully pulling me out of the house, while Darnell runs after Sarah.

Alice bursts through the front door and drags me all the way to the car. By then, my icy demeanor is starting to melt and a tear or two is making their way down my cheeks. Darnell, carrying a shouting Sarah over his shoulder, unlocks the car and throws Sarah into the backseat with me.

"Your house or Mia's?" He asks Alice, who climbs into the driver's seat.

"Mia's."

He nods stiffly and then we're backing out of the drive way. A strange, strangled sound works its way up my throat and I suck in a sharp, shuddery gasp of air. I twist my head away from the other people in the car and towards the window, watching the world blur.

Sarah mutters something about girls being on their periods and passes out beside me.

Her head hits my shoulder with a soft, terrifying thump. I jump in my seat and my watery gaze flashes to her face, startled. Her long lashes cast long shadows across her face, especially with the added help of the nighttime darkness, and I hear Alice sigh softly.

"I think that's the quickest party we've ever been to." She muses softly. "Didn't last more than fifteen minutes."

I say nothing. Guilt washes through my body, an added weight to the grief and heartache. It's my fault tonight didn't turn out like it was supposed to, that we had to leave so early. If I had just contained my anger, I wouldn't have hurt him. And if I hadn't hurt him, my friends wouldn't have to leave so early. Not that they had to, I remind myself, they could've stayed.

But I have really good friends.

Alice pulls into my drive way and cuts the engine. Carefully, she pulls Sarah out of her seat and I jump down from mine. We fumble up to the front door and I unlock the front door with the key I'd taken off its little blue lanyard and stuffed into my front pocket.

My dad looks up from the comics section in the newspaper, gray eyes wide. "You're back…early."

I can tell he noticed the makeup running down my cheeks. Casting him a wary smile, I shrug. "Too many people that I don't like." His lips twist into a sly smirk, we both aren't entirely people persons, and he brushes a strand of dark hair behind his ears.

"Oh," I add swiftly, before my composure shatters, "By the way. I'm single."

Before he can say anything else, I start towards the stairs and bound my way up to my room. I hear Alice sigh and can almost hear her shaking her head. The newspaper is neatly folded and I can hear him setting it aside. Before I shut my bedroom door, I hear my dad snarl something.

"Tell me she killed him?"

It brings a faint smile to my lips.

* * *

**Me: Say it. *tugs on fistful of Deidara's hair* **

**Deidara: *grunts* Why the fuck do I have to say it? You're the one who posted late, un!  
**

**Me: It's your damn fault for distracting me!  
**

**Tobi: Tobi is a good boy!  
**

**Deidara: Have Tobi do it, yeah! **

**Tobi: Cloud-chan is very sorry for not posting sooner :3 she is having a hard time writing for Hidan.  
**

**Me: Which reminds me, for those of you who actually read this junk, (and thank you for doing so) I might change it to Deidara...or Itachi! Because Hidan isn't working out as well as I'd originally planned...  
**

**Itachi: *enters room* Hn.  
**

**Deidara: Not the Uchiha, un. I'll disown you as my wife if you do so, yeah.  
**

**Me: HE ADMITTED IT! *glomps***

**Tobi: Get off my sempai! He's mine!*hurriedly rushes after us as Deidara tries to escape my strangle hold*  
**

**Itachi: *sighs* I guess I'll do the disclaimer. *glares at others in room* Cloud-chan doesn't own Naruto, although she really wishes she did, and only owns Mia+, Alice+, Darnell+, and Sarah+. For those of you who don't know, the pluses stand for families and other minor characters in the story.  
**

**Hidan: *enters room* Hey, why the fuck am I not in this chapter? I thought this was a 'Hidan' love story, not a fucking 'Brandon' love story.  
**

**Me: Shut up! The plot bunnies have attacked, I tell you!  
**

**Hidan: Whatever.  
**

**Tobi: HIDAN-SAN IS JEALOUS!  
**

**Me: Alright, this is long enough. Say bye guys!  
**

**Everyone: BYE! AND THANK YOU FOR READING AND PUTTING UP WITH US!  
**


	3. Chapter Two-

My phone hits the wall across from me with a loud thud and I watch it slam against the ground. The touch screen shatters, the break splintering up the length of the rectangular device like a spider web. It sits there for a few moments, the screen still illuminated with my new text, and then the light flickers off.

"What was that?" My dad opens the door to my room and sticks his head in.

I don't respond. I simply stare at the phone and fiddle with my fingers in my lap. My dad takes a hesitant step inside, brows furrowed and the skin on the bridge of his nose is scrunched up. From first glance, he looks strangely like a human version of Itachi, with his long inky black hair and the way it's styled. I got my pale skin and gray eyes from him.

His gray eyes blink behind his thin rectangular glasses. "Did you…?"

"Yes."

He presses his lips together into a firm line. My brother darts into the room and leaps onto my bed, cackling evilly. He knows he's not supposed to be in my room, but when Dad's inside too, he doesn't get in trouble and uses it to his advantage.

"Tyler, out." My dad steps away from the door, allowing him enough room to pass, and jabs a finger in the direction of the door to add emphasis.

Said demon lets out a disgruntled sigh. "But you're in here!"

"I said out."

Muttering things under his breath, my ten year old brother hops off the bed and shoots me a swift glare before retreating back to his room across the hall. I see the curly brown hair on his head bounce with each step and then vanish behind the doorframe to his room. My dad sighs and leans against my own doorframe, arms folded across his chest.

"We could've blocked the number, you know. You didn't have to break it." He says gently, a brow lifting gracefully at my now sour expression.

I'd forgotten about that option.

I angle my face away from him, gaze resting on the outside world. Right now, I'm sitting on the large bay window in my room, surrounded by a mountain of pillows, blankets, my Deidara Plushie, and a neat pile of tin soda cans. From my window seat, I can see the backyard and the thin large towering forest behind it. The tire swing dangles from the lowest branch of the tree closest to our house, dancing slowly in the wind.

"So I take it you're not going to school tomorrow?" Dad continues to prod and poke me with his voice, trying to get an vocal response. I haven't talked since that night. It's been almost two days, the party being on Friday to celebrate the end of the first week of school, and tomorrow is Monday.

My lips press together into a firm line. I really don't want to deal with Christine and Brandon. It's bad enough the latter can't seem to stop texting me.

Dad sighs, finally coming to terms with the fact that I'm not planning on speaking anytime soon, and exits the room. He shuts the door behind him softly and I can hear him lightly tread down the old creaky staircase.

Our house is so old that even the roaches have been here for generations.

My parents inherited this old two story estate when I was five from my old, scary Great Aunt Claudia. She'd inherited this place from her own grandmother, whose grandfather built it during the Revolution as a plantation for slaves and cotton. The lots surrounding our house now were a part of that plantation, but my dad slowly sold them off-reducing the house lot to a hundred acres. The main house itself is a feat, with six large bedrooms-complete with spa-like bathrooms and large walk in closets-,eight bathroom, a kitchen, living room, library, and office space for my father-who owns a construction company now.

My room is one of the more modern styled rooms to our house. The gray-covered bed is centered against the farthest wall from the door, several feet from where I sit now, and a desk is pushed up into the opposite corner. A large television set sits directly across my bed, hanging high on the wall, and shelf after shelf of movies line the wall beneath it. My manga shelf sits next to my bed, pushed up against the wall in between the bed and my window seat, and tons of Naruto posters cover the soft sky blue walls. The curtains that are supposed to cover the bay window beside me match the covers of my bed, both a soft gray color.

I sigh softly. My phone screen lights up again.

Growling, I look away and curl up towards my window on my side. I pull the gray covers I'd yanked off my bed over my body and bring the edge up to my cheek.

Outside, I can see Tyler and his best friend run across the yard and into the trees. A sense of nostalgia washes over my body-like a buttery warm wave. When we were younger, Alice and I would run to the cover of the thick forest to play. We were wolves, her a deep ebony black wolf with charcoal eyes and I was a milky white wolf with gray eyes. For the first two years, we did nothing but practice our stealth and communication. Once we felt comfortable with our skills, we lured Tyler out to play with us one summer day and put our skills to the test.

Now, Alice and I can practically read each other's mind-thanks to that skillful exercise-and can maneuver through the forest quietly enough not to scare the rabbits away.

That was also the reason Alice and I didn't have many friends in elementary school. We were extremely secluded. We viewed the world as Them and Us. Rarely did we talk to anyone, they simple weren't the same as we were, and the wall we built stood strong until we met Darnell in our first year of middle school.

I scoff softly. That had been an interesting year.

Darnell, a tiny little tot who'd only come up to my shoulders, had been bullied since his first day of school. I'd never had him in my class, so I'd never given it much thought. Until, that is, I found him crying in a janitor's closet on my way to Gym. I'd opened the door to investigate the small whimpering noises and peered into the darkness, almost screaming when I saw the shiny gel-like egg insides slowly seeping down his face, mingling with tears, and into his clothes.

I became fairly protective of him after that, convincing Alice to help me chase the bullies away. He's changed a lot since then.

We met Sarah that year too, only later on. Sarah had been a major bookworm like me, only louder. We stumbled upon her in the library, when I was trying to pick out a new book. We'd spied the same novel and had both reached for it-screaming loudly when our fingers brushed.

Tyler rushes back out from the woods, grinning widely, and leaps onto the tire swing. It swings wildly, twirling and moving like a buoy being bullied by the rough ocean waves in a storm. Jimmy, his friend, laughs heartily and follows suit, leaping onto the moving swing.

My phone vibrates against the wood floor. Someone's calling me.

I go to ignore it, but the buzzing is so loud in my quiet room that it soon becomes all I can think of. Gritting my teeth, I try to drown out the sound by pressing my pillow up to my ear but it's hopeless.

Huffing, I throw the covers off of me, shiver against the sudden burst of cold air, and swing my legs over the edge. I stand and shuffle over to my phone, wary of any broken glass pieces that may still be on the floor, and pick it up.

It's him.

I sigh and walk over to my computer. Quickly, I pull up a YouTube video of a girl screaming loudly for five minutes straight and turn the volume up. I set my phone's mic up against the speakers and the press play and the answer button simultaneously.

The scream rips through the air and I grimace at the volume.

My phone exits out of the call-screen, signaling that he had hung up. I turn the video off and then my phone so he can't call again. I'm not sure why I didn't even do that in the first place. Gosh, I'm so stupid sometimes.

Sighing softly, I set my injured phone down onto my desk, exiting out of my internet browser. I stare at my background for a few moments. It's a group image of the Akatsuki, my favorite anime characters, that I'd found on DeviantArt. My gaze studies each member for a few seconds before zeroing in on Deidara.

If only he existed.

I wonder what he would be like; if I were to ever meet him in person. Would he be nice, like all the fan fiction stories depict him to be? Or would he be mean spirited?

Either way, I'm certain he'd be so much better than the boys here.

My heart begins to ache again. It's like a dull throbbing in my chest, like my heart and lungs are being dragged across a bed of broken glass. I had given him almost two years of my life, of my devotion, of my love. And he'd shattered me in the only way truly possible-by cheating.

I don't understand cheating.

Before I can dwell too much on the sour subject, I stand and make my way back to my window seat. I grab my remote as I pass it on the edge of my bed and press the play button. All weekend I've done nothing but drown my sorrows in episodes of Naruto Shippuden. I've watched every episode almost twice now.

"Time for another round." I whisper softly, settling in.

Somewhere, in between eleven and midnight, I manage to look over out the window. A line of pure white shoots across the sky and I sit up, gasping. I don't rub my eyes and do a double take, I don't question anything. I simply close my eyes and wish with all my heart that things will get better.

I also add that I get to meet Deidara.

Because, I mean, how awesome would that be?


	4. Chapter 3-

**Okay, sorry about the confusion . I forgot to post the second chapter and I thought I already had, when turns out I didn't. So for those of you who have already read this, this is the actual chapter three. The last chapter basically explains her relationships with her friends and what her dad looks like and yadda yadda. Please go read it XD **

**Thanks so much for reading! :D If you have any ideas or ways for me to get better, don't be afraid to review or pm me and tell me ^^ **

**-Cloud**

* * *

"MIA! WAKE UP!"

My brother pounds relentlessly on the door. I groan loudly and roll over, almost falling off the edge of the bay window. The covers fall off and I sit up, grabbing my IPod and slipping my earphones in. I find my favorite song, Fake it by Seether, and turn the volume all the way up.

I open the door to my room and lightly tread down the old squeaky staircase.

"You left your stupid doll on the table again." Tyler sneers as I pass him, holding a bowl of Lucky Charms in his little grubby paws. Pausing, I stare at the back of his retreating head until I fully take in the words he said. I scowl and move back. I smack him in the head, lightly, and he growls a barely coherent profanity.

Nobody calls my Deidara plushie stupid.

But as I enter the kitchen, I frown darkly. I don't remember coming downstairs last night or bringing my plushie down at all. But then why would he say I left it down here?

I sigh and shake my head. Whatever, I'd still check it out.

After my food.

I walk over to the fridge and pull it open. Grabbing the milk, I spin around and set it down onto the island counter behind me. I grab a bowl and a spoon and the box of Lucky Charms my brother left open for me and my dad.

"Good morning, Princess." Dad greets sleepily as he shuffles into the kitchen. He's still in his faded dark green robe and what-used-to-be white slippers. His precious newspaper is rolled up in his hands.

Grimacing at the nickname, I allow him to press a swift kiss onto the top of my head as I pour my cereal. Dad grabs the box from me and pours himself a bowl, gray eyes watching me warily. I ignore him and make my way to the table, finally, to see what my brother was grouching about.

My eyes widen.

Sitting on the table, facing my way, is a small Deidara doll. He's about the size of a Barbie, with the same almost bleached blonde hair in his infamous style. Only his hair is a little more…natural looking, compared to the Barbie's I used to own and what I can recall of them. And his visible blue eye doesn't look painted on…Maybe it's one of those blinking dolls?

No, it can't be.

"That's yours right?" Dad casts the doll a wary glance. "He was on the counter this morning, sitting next to the cereal box. You didn't sleep walk last night did you?"

I set my bowl down next to the doll and glance back over my shoulder. "You honestly think I could make it down the stairs like that?"

"Good point."

My dad exits the room, presumably going up to his office. I peer a little closer at the doll, hesitant about picking it up. "Huh." I muse, straightening back up, hands moving to my hips. "I wonder where I got you. You look almost…real."

Shrugging, I pull the chair out and pick up my spoon. I scoop up a spoonful and lift it to my mouth, eyes never leaving the doll.

Then I hear it.

It's a small, rumbling gurgle. Very faint and yet clear as day in the silence of the room.

I blink, slowly lowering my spoon down, and then dart my hand out, making a grab for the doll. It jumps up and dodges, little ninja sandals skidding against the wood table. The visible blue eye narrows and his blonde bangs swing slightly from the movement before settling.

I reach out again.

He ducks to the left, hands withdrawing something from his flowing cloak, and I wrench my hand back once I see the sliver of silver.

"Holy shit." I breathe.

He glares back defiantly.

The noise sounds again, only louder this time. My head quirks to the side and I blink. It takes my mind a few moments to process what's going on-other than the fact that my doll now has a live-action feature-and I stand.

"Stay." I order, hoping that he'll listen and won't run off. "I'm going to get you food." I add softly.

Opening cabinet, I pull the box of cereal back out. I'm not sure what a doll would eat-or Deidara for that matter, so I will simply improvise. I grab a small plate and walk back into the dining room. He stands on the table, crouched low into a fighting stance on the balls of his feet-ready to jump at any given moment. His ice colored eyes are cautious, flickering back and forth between the box and my face.

I sit back down and pour out a small amount onto the plate. Gently, I slide it closer to him and then pick up my spoon to finish eating. I hate it when my cereal gets soggy.

Slowly, Deidara moves closer to the plate. It's like watching a cat on the prowl, freezing to watch its prey for any sudden movements and then jumping at it. He tugs the plate a few feet away and then plops down beside it.

He snatches out and grabs a marshmallow. It's so big that he has to hold it with two hands.

I watch him as I eat and he does the same. His eyes are narrowed, untrusting and cautious, where mine convey a bored look.

My IPod dings softly. I jump in my seat, probably startling the doll, and pull it out. I frown at the screen. It says I have a new email…I hope I didn't give Brandon my email. I don't think I did…

I unlock it swiftly and bring the page up.

"Dammit." I growl, arm drawing back to throw it at the wall. Luckily, Dad comes in to wash his bowl out and sees me.

"You better not break that one too!" He barks.

I jump again, scowl at him, and then kind of throw it at the table. I guess I'm glad I didn't break it, because it's virtually my life, but I can always get a new one, right? Dad scowls at me and shakes his head, gray eyes flickering to the doll.

He huffs. "You better eat all that cereal."

I stick my tongue out at him and take an irritated bite of my cereal.

"Oh, and Alice called. She's coming over after school." Dad steps out of the room and I hear the stairs creak beneath his weight as he makes his way up them. My eyes widen and my lips twitch into a small smile. I'd forgotten! No school today! For me anyways.

My eyes flutter shut. I take a deep breath, fashion another bored look onto my face, and then take another bite of my cereal. I glance over to Deidara-who's halfway through his mound of cereal. "Do you want some more?" I ask.

He simply stares at me.

I shoot him a dirty look. "What? Itachi got your tongue?"

He doesn't laugh. I sigh and shake my head, grumbling 'whatever' under my breath. Standing, I take the box and reclose it and put it back up. As I pass the sink, I dump my bowl into it and run some water through the milk. I walk back to the table and scowl darkly.

All that's left is an empty plate.

I curse softly. "What are you? A fucking cat now? You only appear when you're hungry."

Grabbing the plate, I run some water through it and then go to grab my IPod off the table, but it's not there. I gasp softly and my heart flutters with panic. I bend over and search the ground beneath it, sliding through chairs and the table legs. Trying to get back up, I hit my head on the edge of the table and let out a loud hiss of pain.

"Fuck." I growl and move out a little further and then stand up.

I glare at the table. That stupid bastard must've taken it when I went to wash his plate. I know it was on the table when I got back from washing my bowl. Muttering profanities, I stomp over to the fridge and grab the small piece of chalk sitting in the little magnet cup. The whole right side of our fridge is one huge chalkboard. Usually, we use it for the grocery list.

I add mousetraps to it.

Almost breaking the chalk as I stuff it back in there, I whip around and shoot the dining room one long last deadly glare. I'm going to find that jerk. Deidara or not, only I get to destroy my property.

I growl as I climb back up my stairs and into my room. I leave the door slightly open and make my way over to my window seat. Plopping down, I curl up in my covers again and stare out the window. Almost as soon as I get settled, I hear my door creak open.

"Where's your phone?" Dad asks from the door.

I nod to my desk. He walks over and replaces the shattered rectangle with several items in his hands. He takes a long look at my phone and then turns it on. "What's he labeled as?"

"His name."

Dad nods and holds the phone out to me. I type in my password and he tugs it back to examine it. I don't look at him, almost afraid of his reaction to the messages that have been flooding my phone. Just looking back to unlock it, I could see the steely ice in his eyes, the cold anger.

"There. He shouldn't text you for a while. It'll take about a month for the company to be able to block his number completely. Here, Sarah misses you."

He holds the phone out to me.

I don't take it. "Did you delete the other messages?"

There's a few tapping sounds. "Now I did."

I take my phone from him and spot a tuff of blonde on my desk. Eyes narrowing, I climb to my feet and pad over to my desk. Deidara-frozen-sits beside my IPod.

"You left them on the counter." Dad shoots the items a puzzled look and then walks towards the door. "Oh, and I called the school. They say they hope you feel better." He shoots me a sly look over his shoulder.

The door shuts softly behind him. I glare at the doll and he glares back.

"Why the hell did you steal my IPod?" I snap at him, grabbing said device swiftly before he can move. It's unlocked and open to my email account. No doubt, he was snooping. I glare at him and lock it, tossing it lightly onto the covered mass of my window seat.

Deidara says nothing, glaring at me.

His eyes slowly move around my room, flickering back to my face after surveying a few feet and then back again. I fold my arms across my chest and quirk a brow.

"You can talk, can't you?" I ask softly, once he's done scoping out my room. "If they can make a doll that moves like a ninja then they should at least have some sort of voice box."

He glares at me. "I'm not a doll, un."

His voice is smooth and silky, like warm butter. Despite the small mouth the words come out of, they're still masculine and deep-not at all squeaky and, well, doll like. I smile in satisfaction and scoff softly, moving forward hesitantly. I pull out my chair and sit down into it, turning my computer on.

"Then what are you?" I shoot him a bemused look.

Deidara smirks. Leaning against the wall behind my desk, he kicks one leg back and folds his arms across his chest, visible blue eye watching me warily. "I'm a ninja, yeah."

I scoff softly. "I knew that. I meant, if you're not a male Barbie then what are you? Do you prefer action figure then? Or figurine?"

"I'm _not_ a doll, un!" He jerks forward, hands curling into tight fists at his sides. Whoops, seems I struck a nerve.

I simply quirk a brow, "Oh?"

He scowls darkly. "I'm real, yeah! Do I fucking look plastic to you?!"

Lips curling into a small smile, I don't answer and type something into the search bar after bringing the internet back up. Deidara glowers at me from his wall space, ice eyes flickering over to the computer screen curiously.

I pull up a picture of a Deidara figure and gesture to it. "I don't know…you look pretty much the same."

Deidara peers closer. His bangs brush forward with the movement. They look so soft…and definitely not plastic like the pictures. Dimly, I wonder if he has mouths on his hands still and what they would be like. I watch him, amused, as he looks at all the other pictures of himself.

"This is fucking creepy, hmm." He grunts finally, edging back away from the screen.

I chuckle. "You haven't seen anything."

He stares at me, obviously expecting me to continue on. I sigh softly and ignore him, plucking my phone off the desk. Three unread texts from Sarah. Poor thing, I'd forgotten about here. I quickly type in a response: yes, I'm fine, sorry.

Not more than a second later does it beep loudly with her response.

"What is that thing, hmm?" Deidara shifts slightly on his feet, frowning towards my phone.

I turn the screen towards him briefly. "It's called a cell phone."

He quirks a brow. "And that is, un?"

"A device used to communicate between two people, whether it be by text or by calling. Right now, I am texting my best friend, Sarah, to assure her that I am okay." I explain dully, "Because if I don't, she will, and I quote, personally walk all the way here to rip my eyes out and shove them so far up my ass that they will pop back out my eye sockets, unquote."

Deidara's nose scrunches up in disgust. He snickers silently. "I like her, yeah."

"Do you?" I feel a brow lift. "Interesting," I muse, face twisting into a sneer. "I didn't know dolls could like people."

"I am not a doll, hmm!" He bristles.

I roll my eyes. "Prove it."

A small stinging pain pokes my cheek. I blink, startled, and my hand flies to my face. My fingers are met with something wet and sticky. I pull back and gasp. My fingers are laced with blood. "What the fuck?" I growl at a now smirking Deidara, pushing back away from my desk.

"You didn't even see it, did you, hmm?" He sneers.

I glare at him. "I asked you to prove that you weren't a doll. I _know_ you're a ninja."

Trudging my way to the bathroom, I grumble profanities beneath my breath. I bend over the counter to peer closer at the mirror, at the small, needle thin scrape across my left cheek. A small bead of blood trickles down from the corner. It's nothing huge, but still. He threw a fucking kunai at my _face_. I was not going to let this one pass.

"Alright you little shit." I reenter my room, "If you throw another kunai at me, I will feed you to my neighbor's demon cat. Got it?"

His smirk broadens. "Touchy, touchy, hmm."

I flip him off.

He snickers and I decide to ignore him. I pick up my phone and reply to Sarah's text, fingers pressing absently at my newly acquired wound. Another text pops up, this one a lengthy paragraph from an unknown number. I read the first few lines, scowl darkly, and throw it onto my bed.

"Stupid boys." I growl, pulling up the internet.

"I'm going to ignore that, hmm." Deidara stares at my phone for a few moments and then his gaze flickers towards the computer screen.

I contemplate my response. Part of my wants to snicker, to say, why should you? You're just a doll. It's not like you have _anything _marking you as a male. But the longer I sit here with him, the longer something grows within the pit of my stomach.

And whatever it is, it's screaming one thing.

_He's real_.


	5. Chapter Four:

"Don't look at me like that." I grumble, eyes pinned on Alice's irritated form as she paces the length of my room, bare feet lightly pressing against the floor with each step. Her long black hair sways freely down her back, held away from her face with a bright white headband.

She stops pacing and shoots me a scary, halfhearted glare. "I'm still killing him."

I frown at her. It makes her uneasy and she begins her pacing again.

Then she stops suddenly. "You watch all those criminal shows! How would you dispose of a body?" Her head whips around, a bright, cheery smile on her face. It's a twisted smile though, and it's creepy when accompanied with her choice of words.

"I am not telling you that." I shake my head.

"Oh come on. You know tons of ways not to get caught." Alice persists, flopping back onto my bed. It creaks softly beneath her weight.

I roll my eyes. "Correction: I know tons of things _not_ to do to get caught. And plus, it's a fiction show. I know a lot of that crap wouldn't work."

Alice grumbles something under her breath and rolls over onto her stomach. "This sucks ass." She shouts into the mattress, said item contorting the words into something almost unintelligible. I stick my tongue out at her and my gaze flickers over to Deidara, who sits beside my computer screen, looking vaguely amused by the entire conversation. I scowl at him.

"Can we call him?" Alice sits up suddenly.

I blink and look over at her. "Uh, no. I don't want to call him while he's fucking some hoe."

"I like that idea." A scary grin glazes her features.

"Why do we have to do _anything_, Alice? I'm fine. It's been two days. I'm over it." I let out an exasperated sigh and then force a big, wide, cheery smile. "And I'm happy! See?"

"That's scary. Put that thing away before you kill someone." Alice grins.

I crack a thin real smile and shake my head. Alice sighs softly and shakes her head, flopping back onto the bed. She stretches her arms out and closes her eyes. "Mia, we have to get revenge somehow."

"I already got my revenge." I mumble, eyes zeroed in on my computer screen. Right now, I'm killing things in Grand Fantasia, the best online game ever, and leveling up.

Alice snorts. "Beating him up and breaking Christine's coffee table is not an appropriate method of revenge. Though it was entertaining, I still want to see them cry."

I roll my eyes. "Whatever. When you get arrested, I'm not an accomplice."

"Oh come on, Mia." Alice whines. "I thought we were partners in crime!"

"Yeah. For every other crime except this one." I sigh and then turn around in my swivel chair. I frown at her and shake my head. "Alice, I'm done."

She stares at me for a few moments, dark eyes blank. Then she nods slightly. "Alright. I won't bother you about it anymore."

I shoot her a grateful smile and look to Deidara. He's busy kneading some clay, long blond bangs continuously falling forward into his face while he works. It's kind of funny because he'll shake his head or blow at them, trying to get them out of his face.

"Is that doll moving?"

I glance back, only to find Alice staring intently at Deidara.

Deidara growls at her. "I'm not a doll, hmm!" He doesn't even bother to look up.

Alice's brows furrow. Her dark eyes flicker my way and I smile sheepishly, wiggling my fingers in a small wave. Her eyes narrow. "Explain?"

"I found him on my kitchen table this morning." I shrug lightly, "And I'm not sure what to think." I lightly poke his side, pursing my lips at the softness of his cloak and the firm, yet squishy body beneath it. "He doesn't seem to be a doll, but I'm not sure how this is possible because…well…you've seen Naruto. You know."

Alice nods and climbs off the bed. Deidara pauses in molding his clay, visible blue orb flickering up towards Alice as she approaches. His icy eye narrows and flickers to me.

"She won't hurt you." I reassure him with a smile.

He seems to trust me, somewhat anyways. Deidara allows Alice to lightly touch his head, a dark scowl contorting his features. "His hair is soft!" She coos softly. "Where'd he get the clay?"

"I had some leftover from when I brought my sculpture home to finish it last week." I shrug lightly. "I guess I'm glad I didn't throw it away, ne?"

Alice chuckles. "True. But where are the others?"

Deidara stiffens. I lift one shoulder in another slight shrug. "I don't know. I haven't seen any other mini-nin running around lately. Deidara, do you know where the rest of the Akatsuki is?" My eyes flicker towards him.

His eyes narrow my way.

I deadpan. "I thought we went through this already…"

"No, hmm." He huffs, scowling. "I haven't seen or heard from them."

Alice purses her lips. Leaning forward slightly, she begins to poke and prod at his chest, trying to distinguish plastic from actual skin. Deidara glares at her heatedly and shoves her finger away from him. "I'm not a fucking dead animal, yeah! Stop poking me!"

"Are you sure?" I crack a smile, lifting my own finger to prod his side.

He glares at me and swats at my hand, leaping up onto his feet to properly deflect my pokes.

"Poor thing." Alice muses, shaking her head. "I feel for you, Deidara. Having to live with Mia and all…" She trails off jokingly and I whip around to swat at her.

"Not funny."

"I found it pretty funny."

"No you didn't, Alice."

Alice sticks her tongue out at me. "Whatever. Let's watch a movie."

I blink at her. "Get the bed ready?"

"Make sure to get something cool." Alice nods sternly, dark eyes twinkling with excitement. My vast movie collection lies downstairs in the den, DVDs and cassettes overflowing floor to ceiling bookshelves that line the walls. My parents met at a movie theater-my mother, being the clumsy one she was, spilled her soda all over my father-and thus they vowed to own every movie ever made.

Which is pretty neat, when you have a lot of free time and you love movies, like me.

I catch sight of the clock as I leave the room. It's only eight o'clock, so I'll have to grab several movies to last us through the night. The stairs creak beneath my weight as I bound down them, running full speed into the den. My dad blinks and glances up from his book, dark brows furrowed. I ignore him and grab a handful of movies and rush back upstairs.

When I step back into my room, Alice is sitting on my bed, shifting a mountain of large pillows around. Several blankets lay at the end, folded neatly into a small pile. My comforter was smoothed out and my Deidara plushie was moved to the bed. I set the movies down and then rush from the room again.

I go into the kitchen and pull out two bags of popcorn. Unfortunately, I cannot shove both of them into the microwave. So I'm forced to stand there in front of the appliance, foot tapping against the wooden floor impatiently, and wait for both bags to cook. Once they're finished, I grab two large bowls and pour the bags' contents inside. Then I rush back up.

"Okay!" I set the bowls on the bed.

Alice is looking through the movies. She holds one up, her brows furrowed. "I've heard of this one. Is it good?"

It's The Mummy.

I gasp. "You've never seen it before?"

She shakes her head.

"I guess we know what we're watching first." I take the case from her and turn around to fiddle with the television in my room. I put on the movie and flip off the lights. Deidara stands awkwardly on the desk, blonde brows furrowed in the direction of the television. I smile slightly and hold my hands out to him, offering silently to carry him to the bed. He climbs onto my hand and holds onto my thumb. I set him down on the pillow in between Alice and I while I climb into the mountain of pillows myself. I snuggle up and get comfortable, wiggling my toes beneath the blanket.

The movie starts. Deidara glances up towards me. "That's so weird, hmm."

"What is?"

"That black magic box. It's moving…and talking…and what are they doing to him, yeah?" His slanted blue orbs squint as he peers closer to the screen. "Why are they wrapping him up like that, un?"

"They're turning him into a mummy." I giggle. "Do you know what that is?"

He shakes his head. "No, un."

"Well, in Ancient Egypt, which is a country here in this world, they used to mummify the dead to preserve the body. Basically, they remove all the internal organs and wrap the corpse up in bandages-like you see there." I point to the screen as I explain. "Because he killed the Pharaoh, he's being buried alive."

"What's a Pharaoh, hmm?"

"The king/queen."

"Oh, un."

It's pretty neat, watching Deidara watch the movie. His sapphire orbs light up with something akin to wonder, following each and every movement of the screen, trying to take it all in at once. I put a small pile of popcorn on the pillow beneath him. He picks at it absently, holding one kernel at a time to his mouth and nibbling on it.

If Alice notices my newfound fascination, she doesn't say anything about it. She's too engrossed in the movie to really talk anyways. But every now and again, her eyes will tear away from the screen to glance over.

I think about tomorrow. Tomorrow I have to go back to school and face everything. What will happen? What will I do with Deidara? Will he be able to handle staying all day inside the house…alone with my father? No, I don't trust that. He'd blow something up…or my dad would find out that he's not just a doll. And that wouldn't be good. I'll have to take him.

Maybe he'll fit into my back pack.

I'll also need to get him new clothes. Maybe I can go to Walmart tomorrow after school and get some Barbie clothes. They're bound to have some, right? I haven't gone into the toy section in forever.

"Is that the mummy guy, hmm?" Deidara points to the rotten mummy corpse that's terrorizing the main protagonists.

I nod. "Yeah. He came back to life."

Deidara brushes the crumbs from the popcorn aside and hops off the pillow. My brows furrow in confusion, until I see him grab the edge of my blanket and hop back onto the pillow. He plops down and brings the blanket up to his chest. He unties his hair, letting the long blonde strands fall free to trickle around his shoulders.

I guess I know where he's sleeping tonight.

* * *

Ugh, I'm so sorry guys. I was looking through this story a weekend ago and I just realized how boring it is! I'll try to make the next chapter a little more entertaining. It's kinda hard when the main character is supposed to be depressed. And sorry it took so long to update too .


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